Growing Older: A Reflection on October's Virtual Campfire Event
I’m currently reading an excellent book that is changing my life as I know it. It’s called Untamed. Perhaps some of you have heard of it, as it has skyrocketed in popularity since it was published earlier this year. The author (and my new personal hero), Glennon Doyle, writes about unleashing the wild that was tamed in all of us as children, and what it means to live the “truest, most beautiful life you can imagine.”
Being immunocompromised in this global pandemic has shown me the terrifying realization that I only get one shot at life. I have feared for my life more than once in the last 7 months, and those moments have been rather clarifying for me. I have spent a lot of time since holding a mirror up to my life and recognizing that my tendencies towards people-pleasing and keeping my opinions to myself weren’t providing me with a life that was authentic or desirable. It was during this time that I began reading Untamed. As I grappled with my life and the future I imagined for myself, I was reading about how possible it was to live a life free of caretaking others’ feelings and making myself smaller, and more aligned with my vision for my future.
“It wasn’t until I had feared for my own life that I realized I could change.”
Amidst these revelations of self and of life, I signed up for October’s Virtual Campfire event, which was on the topic of “Growing Older.” Truthfully, when I initially signed up for this event, I didn’t anticipate getting much out of it. I thought “what does a woman in her late twenties know about growing older?” But once the discussion started, I was reminded of my recent awakening; of wanting to make the most of the singular life I had.
As it turned out, I wasn’t the only one who had taken stock of her life during quarantine. I heard echoes of these same thoughts in the Campfire, and no longer felt like my age disqualified me from the discussion. After all, death is an inevitable part of the human condition. Yet, this was the first time I was able to openly speak about both the fears and the hopes I had for the rest of my impermanent life. I heard from folks of many different ages who heard the clock ticking on their life for a variety of reasons and wanted to do the things they had always wanted to do but hadn’t. For some, this meant spending more time with family. For others, this meant abandoning the expectation of settling down and deciding to make plans to travel and see the world.
I was reminded of a quote from Untamed which said “…we set our lives on fire for the chance to become the women we were born to be.” It wasn’t until I had feared for my own life that I realized I could change. I had the power and ability to live the life I imagined for myself, however different that looked from the life I had led so far. Growing older didn’t mean I had to stay the same person that my friends and family knew. I finally felt allowed and encouraged to see some sparks fly and live a life that better suits the woman I want to become. Not everyone needs to set fire to their lives as they grow older in order to live a life they’re proud of or happy with when their time on this earth comes to an end. But we do all deserve to live the truest, most beautiful life we can imagine.
“Growing older is universal; it affects everyone, regardless of race, gender, economic status, or any other quality. ”
We will all grow older…heck, we are growing older as I write this and as you read it. What do you want to feel when you look back on your life? If that feeling is different than what you feel right now, you have the power to do something about it!
Growing older is universal; it affects everyone, regardless of race, gender, economic status, or any other quality. What do you think about aging and death? How has the pandemic changed your perspective in these areas? Do you think we should be discussing these topics more openly? Join the discussion in the comments below!
If you relate to anything stated above, you may enjoy Eat Breathe Thrive’s Virtual Campfire series! This series was created as a way to foster connection and conversation among people you may not otherwise meet. During my first Campfire, I found myself relating with total strangers, and the quarantine loneliness that had crept into my life dissipated altogether. I invite you to join November’s Campfire, which will be focused on Grief & Loss. Perhaps you will come away feeling more connected with yourself and those around you, just as I did. Register for this free event here. We look forward to seeing you!
About The Author
Kelsey Gilchriest is a mental health advocate passionate about breaking down the stigmas that surround mental illness. While in treatment for an eating disorder, her therapist challenged her to use creativity to defy her perfectionism, and her own personal blog was born. The more she wrote and expressed her fears, hopes, and struggles openly and honestly, the more comments and messages she received from readers who saw themselves in her stories. Years later, Kelsey’s blog is still going strong as she continues advocating for those who feel voiceless and dismantling the idea that those with mental health struggles should stay silent.
Kelsey resides in Nashville, Tennessee, and works as a Peer Mentor at Equip. She enjoys yoga and photography in her spare time. Kelsey is thrilled to be writing for Eat Breathe Thrive, and thanks you for reading!